


You and Me

by Miss_Peg



Category: Station 19 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, New Relationship, Nightmares, Vacation, Vacation Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-09
Updated: 2019-10-22
Packaged: 2020-11-28 13:29:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20967323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Peg/pseuds/Miss_Peg
Summary: The skyscraper fire left Vic working harder than she's worked before, blocking out memories of that fateful night. She's not spoken to her best friend in weeks. She's fearful about her job after shouting at her boss. She's been having regular nightmares that leave her shaken and close to tears. She deserves her vacation, the only problem is that same boss is on the same flight. Not only the same flight, but he's seated next to her...





	1. The Flight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [madnephelite](https://archiveofourown.org/users/madnephelite/gifts).

> Thanks so much to madnephelite for providing such brilliant prompts - this one is also for you from the prompt "Pre-relationship: Vic and Lucas end up next to each other on a flight to a tropical paradise."
> 
> I wasn't sure where this was going to go when I first started thinking of ideas. As it turns out, it's likely to be a two-part fic. The only problem (though you may not see it as such) is it could probably be more than that...maybe three parts would make more sense...
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Station 19. I just really want to keep visualising Barrett Doss in uniform...

_The fire burned hot against her face, licking her skin, heating her up from the inside. She ran through the flames, dashing over lines of fire to reach him. She could see him in the distance, through the smoke and darkness. She could hear his laboured breaths. The faster she ran, the more flames she beat, the farther away he got, until she keeled over, breathless._

“Excuse me.”

Victoria Hughes opened her eyes. An ocean of noise surrounded her, threatening to drown her. Announcements came in, people talked loudly, on cellphones and to other travellers. A young boy shouted and screamed as his mother told him ‘no’. The seats around her were empty.

“Are you Victoria Hughes?” She glanced up at the woman standing over her and nodded. “We’re waiting for you. It’s final call for boarding.”

“Oh.” She stood up and handed over her passport and boarding pass. “Sorry. I fell asleep.”

After working what felt like non-stop over the last five weeks, Vic needed a break. The skyscraper fire took its toll, and though she buried herself in her work, the aftermath left her broken. Montgomery had only been out of the hospital for a couple of weeks. She wanted to go see him, she knew she needed to; she just couldn’t quite find the emotional energy.

Vic walked down the passenger boarding bridge, a small bag in her hand. She needed this break. She needed some sunshine, and some time away from normality, if only to find some semblance of calm after all that had happened.

“Your seat is right down here.” The air hostess sped down the aisle. Vic rushed to keep up. The woman’s tone was abrupt. “If you could put your bag away and get into your seat quickly, we have a schedule to keep.”

Hundreds of pairs of eyes fixed on her as she loaded her bag – minus a book – into the overhead locker. She could hear the whispers, the frustrated sighs, the tuts of condemnation. Memories of her dream lingered, and the whole situation brought tears to her eyes. She pushed them down and looked for her seat.

“Sorry,” she whispered to the two people in her row that had to move so she could sit by the window. They stepped out into the aisle and she threw herself into her seat, buckling the seatbelt without another moment’s thought. She buried her nose in her book, but the words wouldn’t register.

“Hughes?”

She looked up at the sound of her name, only for her eyes to land on the one person she least expected. Chief Ripley. Vic slouched in her seat and closed her eyes briefly. If she had to list all of the people she didn’t want to spend six non-stop hours on a plane with, Chief Ripley was currently pretty high up on that list.

She turned to him, her smile forced. “Chief…Ripley…hi.”

“That bad?” he asked.

Her voice shook. “No.”

“It’s okay,” he said. “I don’t know how I’d feel about sitting next to my boss on a six hour flight, either.”

She ran her fingers through the back of her hair, her eyes wide. “It’s fine.”

“I can tell it’s not.” He pointed out of the window. “Wait until we’re in the air and I’ll see if I can change seats.”

“You don’t…”

“I don’t mind.”

Her nostrils flared. “Yeah, well, I do.”

“You’re stubborn, aren’t you?” he said, rubbing his chin.

Averting his gaze, Vic glanced out of the window. “Yeah, and?”

“If it’s okay with you then I’ll remain beside you. But if it’s not, I don’t mind asking to move.”

She shrugged, opening her book once more. She stared down at the words on the page. “Honestly, it doesn’t matter. I‘m just gonna sit here and read my book.”

X

_Blue flames surrounded her; invisible to the naked eye. She didn’t know how, or why, she could see them. She couldn’t move, stranded in the centre of a circle of fire. In the distance she could see him, lay on the floor. His blood seeped across the tarmac, pooling around her feet; sticky, red rivers. The fire disappeared. She set off towards him, wading through thick gushes of blood. The faster she walked, the harder each step was, until his body disappeared into the ocean of red._

“Montgomery, no!” she shouted. Vic opened her eyes, each breath hard to take, a weight upon her chest. She looked around only to find Chief Ripley, and a man on the end of her row, staring at her.

“Are you okay?” Ripley asked, his hand landing on her wrist.

She snatched it away, staring down at his fingers. Tears filled her eyes. When she closed them, they skirted their way down her cheeks.

“I’m fine.” They both knew she wasn’t. Her voice betrayed her. She leaned against the window and stared out at the blue sky, and the field of clouds below.

“Victoria.”

The gentle tone of his voice only made the tears worse. She wanted to look him in the eye and show him that she was fine, but she couldn’t. Not without showing him the very vulnerability she tried to hide on a daily basis.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed.”

“Please,” she said, her voice strained. “This is not the time, nor the place.”

“You’re upset. I don’t think you should have to be alone with that just because you don’t like me.”

She ran her fingers across the tears, brushing them aside. “I’m fine, leave me alone.”

X

“Would you like the chicken curry or the vegetable pasta bake?”

Vic glanced up from her book. The air hostess pulled the trolley to a stop at the end of her row, and applied the break. She handed over a tray to the man on the end, then looked at Ripley. Vic secured her book in the seat pocket and adjusted her position.

“I’ll have the pasta, please,” Ripley said, opening up his fold down table.

She put the tray on his table, and repeated the question, as Vic unfolded her own. “Please can I get the chicken?”

“Hopefully it’s not as bad as I’m envisaging,” Ripley said. He smirked. “The last time I ate airplane food was some years ago.”

She smiled back. “The airline’s pretty good.”

They ate in silence, just as Vic liked it. She didn’t much enjoy the uncomfortable moments of conversation. Her stomach rumbled. She was hungrier than she’d realised. The stress of the morning left her feeling anything but appeased by the small meal.

“You gonna eat that?” Vic asked, noticing that Ripley had left his dessert.

“No.” He picked up the small plastic dish and handed it over. “You can have it.”

“Thanks.”

The plane shook dramatically. A couple of people cried out as drinks and food spilled everywhere. Vic caught her second piece of chocolate cake before it landed in her lap. Her heart leapt into her throat. She sat stock still for a moment, waiting for it to happen again. When it did, she lifted her hand up and placed it over Ripley’s on the arm rest between them.

“Oh. Shit. Sorry.” She returned her hand to her lap. The seatbelt sign came on. “I don’t know why I did that.”

“Are you okay?” he asked, tilting his head.

“Yeah.” She sighed. He’d watched her fall apart more than once already and they were barely halfway through the flight. She’d already shouted at him at work. He knew she was hot headed and stubborn. She closed her eyes briefly, and looked up at him again. “No. I hate flying. I only usually do it if I have to, only this time I needed a break and I thought why travel to somewhere within the US when I could get to Mexico in the same amount of time? It was a good idea before I booked it and now I wish I’d never bothered.”

He wiped his mouth with his napkin and twisted in his seat. “Hughes, if you need to hold my hand, please, just do it. Don’t worry that I’m the chief. If you’re scared when there’s turbulence, I’d rather you seek comfort in my presence.”

She snorted so loud that a couple of people in the next row glanced over. Vic’s cheeks flushed. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t laugh.”

“Is it really such a bizarre idea that I could be of service to you?”

“You say that like I’m a customer, not your colleague.”

“I think we’ve perhaps got off on the wrong foot,” he said, folding up his table the second the air hostess took his tray away. “Would you perhaps be okay if we start again?”

She stared at him, wide eyed. “Before or after I held your hand accidentally?”

“After. If you’d prefer.”

“Definitely after.”

“Great.” He held out his hand. “I’m Lucas, nice to meet you.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Are we pretending we don’t even know each other, or are you just introducing yourself because I normally call you Chief Ripley?”

“We’re starting again, which means not knowing each other’s names.”

“Gotcha.” She took his hand and shook it. “Victoria. You can call me Vic, if you want to.”

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why do you like to be called Vic?”

“I…don’t know.” She sat back in her seat and contemplated his question for a moment. “In school I got Vicky a few times, but it never sat well with me. I like being Victoria. I guess at the academy being surrounded by guys, Vic made sense as a nickname.”

“It meant you could blend in.”

She frowned. For the first time since she’d met him, Ripley spoke a truth she really connected with. “Yeah.”

“Then if it’s alright with you, while we’re on this flight, I’d prefer to call you Victoria. Is that acceptable?”

“Yes, that’s acceptable.”

X

“How can you not have seen The Greatest Showman?” Vic asked, placing her hand on his shoulder. “It’s only the greatest movie ever made.”

“I guess I don’t really like movies. I prefer television.”

She removed her hand, and neither of them said a word about it. She frowned at him. “Let me guess, you’re a documentary guy.”

“I do like documentaries. But I also like period dramas.

“Seriously?” She scoffed, shaking her head. “Oh you’re such an old man!”

“Excuse me?”

“Period dramas and documentaries. Have you even seen Game of Thrones?”

He shrugged. “No. I don’t like to watch much violence.”

“Did you really just say that?” The laugh started small, barely audible, until she couldn’t help but laugh out loud.

He narrowed his eyes, but a smile spread across his face. “Would you prefer I lie to appease you?”

“Sure. Anybody knows that when you start a relationship with someone you pretend to like the things that they like.”

“When you start a relationship?” He leaned forward, a crease formed between his eyebrows. “I’m not sure what you think…”

“I didn’t say that. I did not say that.” She covered her face with her hands and let out a small groan. Sitting upright again, she clasped her hands together. “That’s not what I meant. I just meant when you…when you…it’s just ridiculous that you haven’t even tried to watch Game of Thrones. The whole world is talking about it and you’re acting like it’s not worth your time. Have you been too busy bingeing on Downton Abbey?”

“The Crown.”

“What’s that about?”

“The Queen of England.”

She scratched her nose and coughed animatedly. “Boring.”

“I like what I like and I’m not gonna apologise for that.”

She shrugged. “Stubborn. I like that.”

“Why? Does it remind you of yourself?”

Wide eyed, she stared him down. “Somebody call the fire department that was a serious burn!”

The plane shook dramatically, moving back and forth repeatedly. Vic grabbed for Ripley’s arm and sat back in her seat. She closed her eyes and muttered away to herself.

“It’s okay.” Ripley rested his hand over her wrist. “It’s just a jet stream triggering a sudden change in wind speed. It’s just like driving down the freeway with your car shaking because of high winds.”

“You know a lot about it?” she whispered, still glued to the back of her seat. The turbulence continued for what felt like an age, and Vic appreciated the feel of Ripley’s fingers trailing across her wrist.

“I like to read,” he said.

She rolled her eyes and snorted. “Let me guess, non-fiction?”

“Well, yes, actually.” The plane shook again. Vic tightened her grip on his arm. He turned his hand around and interlinked their fingers, squeezing her hand. “It’s okay.”

She closed her eyes and focused on every breath. “Doesn’t feel okay.”

“When was the last time you flew?”

“Last year.” The movement slowed and Vic loosened her grip on his hand. “I had to go to Minnesota to visit my folks around Christmas; nearly got stranded there because of a blizzard.”

“I’ve not flown since I was married.”

“You were married? Past tense?” She stared down at her fingers, still interlinked with the chiefs.

“Twice, actually.”

“Twice?” Her eyes bugged. “That’s a lot of marriage.”

He dropped her hand and returned his to his lap. “You’ve gotta remember I’m almost a whole human adult older than you.”

She frowned. “How do you know?”

“I’m your boss. I’ve read your file.”

“I have a file?” She tilted her head and smirked. “What’s it say?”

“I’m not gonna tell you that!”

“Is it all good?”

“Mostly.”

“What’s the not good part?” she asked, resting her elbows on her knees.

“When you shouted at me after the skyscraper fire.”

“You wrote me up?”

“I made a note. I did give you a verbal warning. If I didn’t write it down then if it happened again and I fired you, you could have protested that I hadn’t given you a warning first.”

“What about the good stuff?”

“What about it?”

“What’s in there?”

He clicked his tongue, and for a moment, Vic thought he was going to brush her off again. He caught her eyes and spoke every word directly to her. “Victoria Hughes is an excellent team player, who will go above and beyond for her colleagues. She has a huge amount of compassion and understanding towards both colleagues, and members of the public. She’s young, which means she has a lot to learn, and has a stubborn streak, which needs managing, but given the right guidance and support she could one day take on more responsibility. Captain Herrera has a lot of respect for you.”

Covering her mouth, Vic chewed on her bottom lip. “Yo…you remembered what it said in my file?”

“Eidetic memory. I remember everyone’s files. I especially remember the rather flattering photograph you submitted with your application to the fire academy.” He scratched his chin and looked sheepish.

“Seriously?” She stared at him, aghast. “I thought they must have shredded that.”

“No. I must say, you looked like a very cute kid.”

She lowered her head into her hands. “My dad took that photo when I went to a fire station open day. It was never supposed to go in my application. It was mistake.”

He grinned. “If it was me making the decision, I’d have gone right ahead and accepted you just like they did.”

“Thank you.” She groaned. Her cheeks grew warm. “I can’t believe you’ve seen a photo of me when I was eight…though if we’re going with I can’t believes, I still can’t believe I’m on the same plane as you, let alone sat next to you.”

“I must admit, at first I was sceptical.”

“Sceptical?”

“The way you spoke to me when you first sat down. I thought this was going to be a tortuous flight. I’m so glad we’ve been able to talk, clear the air.”

“Me too.”

X

_A flash of bright orange light filled Vic’s vision. The flames billowed up and over her head, surrounding her with thick dark smoke. Visibility was low, which meant every step she took was hampered. She kept reminding herself that it would take as long as it would take, but she couldn’t stop looking. He had to be there somewhere._

“Victoria?”

_The call of her name spurred her on. She tried to move faster, but she could barely see her own hand in front of her face. Ash rained down on her from above._

“Victoria.” A pair of hands rested on her shoulder and she bolted upright, opening her eyes. She looked around to find Ripley staring at her. “You fell asleep again. I don’t know what you were dreaming about, but you sounded in distress.”

“I’m fine.” She rubbed at her eyes. “Fine.”

“You know, whatever’s going on for you, we have another hour until we’re due to land and I’m a good listener.”

She pressed her lips tightly together. The memory of her latest dream still lingered. “There’s nothing much to say.”

“Earlier you shouted out Montgomery’s name when you fell asleep. Look at you, you’re shaking.”

“Oh. That.” She looked down at her hands, moving uncontrollably on her thighs. She cupped them together, hiding them from sight.

“There’s no pressure. You’re on vacation, I’m on vacation. I’ve seen and heard a lot throughout my years in the fire department. Don’t discount me just because I’m the chief. What you say in the air stays in the air.”

She let out a chuckle and rolled her hands over in her lap. “A few months ago I was so afraid of fire the team helped me hide it from Herrera and Gibson while they were acting co-captains.”

“Oh. I see.” His wide eyes stared at her and she recoiled slightly. No matter how much he reassured her that it was confidential, she knew that once they hit the ground in Seattle again, that could change. “And are you…”

“It’s over. Thankfully.”

He smiled. “You’re not the first firefighter to be afraid of fire.”

“I’m not?”

“No. When I started out my mentor was so afraid of fire after he nearly died that he was put on medical leave. He never returned. Thankfully he was an amazing trainer, so he got to pass on his skills and expertise – away from the flames. He’s one of many examples I could give.”

Her eyes glazed over. After everything she’d been through over the last few months, Vic had never really discussed it in depth with anyone. She may have shared her fear of fire with her team, but they all went into fix-it mode. After the initial conversation, none of them really just…listened. “Sometimes when I go to sleep I can still picture the flames and I wake up drenched in sweat and unable to breath.”

“I thought you said you were over it?”

“The skyscraper.” She grasped her leg in an attempt to stop its involuntary shaking. “I usually dream about Travis being trapped, and I can’t get to him. I know he’s hurt, badly hurt, and I can’t reach him.”

“That’s why you called out his name.”

“It’s stupid.” Her laughter felt strained. “He’s fine. I should be over this. I’ve had enough time to get over it. God I need this break.”

“Post-traumatic stress happens to the best of us. We’ve all been there, to some degree. At a fire, or an incident, where we can’t stop reliving it in our minds.”

“Even you?”

He breathed in deeply, before slowly letting it out again. “I accidentally killed my best friend’s wife.”

Vic leaned forward, her mouth agape. “What?”

“We were minutes from the hospital. She wasn’t gonna make it. I gave her amiodarone even though she was allergic to iodine. I thought we had time. I thought it would keep her alive long enough to get her to the ER. But it didn’t. She died within minutes of reaching the hospital.”

“It sounds like you did the best you could under very difficult circumstances.”

“He never forgave me. It’s been fifteen years.” A brief silence fell between them. Vic searched for the right way to respond, but she was speechless. She always saw the chief as infallible. He was the best in their field, and he always tried to do the right thing. Even if she didn’t agree. She opened her mouth to say…something, when he jumped in. “I know why you were angry with me, Victoria. At the skyscraper. You thought I should save your team above anyone else. I get it. I’d have done anything to save Claire in that moment. Absolutely anything. I shouldn’t have left them in there without some support. I agonise over it frequently. Did I make the right call? Should I have done something else? What would have happened if I’d put them first?”

She swallowed. A lump formed in the back of her throat. “Do you ever reach a decision? Over whether you made the right call?”

“You might not want to hear it, but I did make the right call. In that moment, it was the right decision. When I look back I look back with hindsight, and I can see things differently. I didn’t have that. You’ve got to see that if I could go back and do it again, knowing what I know, I would do things differently. But we can’t ever know what we don’t know, until we know it. Do you understand?”

“Yeah. I guess I do.” She looked at his hand, clutching the arm rest. She rolled her eyes and grabbed it, linking their fingers together. She pulled his hand towards her. “You had an impossible decision to make and I overstepped. I didn’t understand, I still don’t, everything that happened that night. I don’t know what made you make the decisions you made. All I really know is that my team were my priority. I didn’t think about everyone else. Not when I had to drag Travis down dozens of flights of stairs. You spoke to me at the worst possible moment, and I don’t think that conversation would ever have gone differently. But now I see that the skyscraper fire affected you just as much as everyone else. I’m sorry for my part in that.”

He rubbed his eyes with his free hand. “This flight has been far more cathartic and less torturous than I was expecting.”

“Thanks…I think?”

X

“That’s my bag!” Vic shouted, pointing as the carousel moved it farther and farther away. She raced along the edge of the conveyor belt.

“Got it.” Ripley stood in front of her, dragging her bag off the belt and placing it beside her.

“Thank you!” she reached out and wrapped her arms around his waist. She jumped back again, regretful at her forward act. “Sorry. I’m tired; it’s been a long flight. I really need a shower and a bed.”

“No problem.” He smiled. “I guess this is it.”

“I guess it is.”

She bounced from one foot to the other, unsure of how best to say goodbye. She held her arms out, and without another word, Ripley stepped into them. The embrace was brief, awkward. They distanced themselves from each other quickly. Six hours was a long time, but somehow it wasn’t long enough. As Ripley walked off with a slight wave, Vic wished she could follow him; if only to not have to spend the next week alone. Once he was out of sight, she headed in the direction of the taxi rank.


	2. The Vacation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter could have been so much longer, but then it would have taken forever to write, and I wouldn't be able to share it with you now. This story could have stretched on, and been very much about their trip, but I didn't want that. I didn't want to write every happy moment of their vacation. But I hope what I have written will make you smile, at least for the most part.
> 
> I really must go to bed. I have a full day induction with my new job tomorrow. It's probably going to be a big bore-fest, but I'd better get some sleep. Here's to an easy few months with lots of writing time - after tomorrow is over.

A good night’s sleep and a morning by the pool was the exact thing Vic needed to unwind. She’d already finished her book, and the feel of the sun on her skin warmed her far greater than the Fall weather in Seattle. She took a stroll in the afternoon along the beach and ate an ice cream from a vendor by the shore. By early evening, she was ready for a nap. She had a brief sleep before getting dressed up for her evening meal, ending her night in the bar.

“Excuse me.” A man sat down at her table. “I Jorge. You have beautiful smile. I buy drink?”

“No. Thanks. I’m waiting for someone.” She wasn’t against hooking up, or having a vacation romance. On the contrary, Vic hoped to meet someone, to share a few glasses of wine or cocktails. She’d brought a whole packet of condoms on the off chance that she would meet someone who could help her to unwind. Jorge was not the man for her. “My girlfriend is meeting me very soon.”

“Girlfriend? You like girl?”

“No.” She could see the excited look in his eyes, and though she didn’t much want to think about where he was going with that, she could also see an out. “Yes. Exactly. I like women.”

“Sexy women together,” he said, his eyebrows wiggled and his tongue ran across his bottom lip. She groaned. The last thing she wanted on her first night was to be hit on by a sleazy guy.

“Please. I’m not interested.”

“Come on!” He reached his hand out and trailed his fingertip across her cheek, brushing her hair aside. “Drink for the lovely princess.”

She stood up, putting as much space between them as possible. “No. Leave me alone.”

“I just want to talk, and buy drink,” he said, following her across the room. His hand wrapped around her wrist before she could get to the bar. She slapped it away.

“What’s going on here?” Vic’s heart leapt. The familiar voice filled her with elation. She caught his eye and before he could say another word, she threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his waist. “Vic? Is this man bothering you?”

“Yes,” she said, with barely a whisper.

“I buy drink, she get angry.”

Ripley untangled her arms and moved her to one side. The temple on his forehead pulsed, and for a moment Vic thought he might punch the man. “Move along, Pal. She’s taken.”

“You?” he asked, narrowing his eyes.

“Yeah, me.” Ripley closed the gap once more and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “You’d better leave her alone or I’ll call hotel management to throw you out.”

“No throw!” He lifted his hands in defence and backed away, muttering to himself. Vic watched him disappear across the room, before approaching somebody else.

“Are you okay?” Ripley asked, his arm still wrapped around her shoulder. She leant against his chest, seeking comfort in his familiar embrace. “Did he hurt you?”

“No. I’m fine.” She sighed. “He just wouldn’t leave me alone. What are you doing here?”

“I’m staying here.”

“Are you serious?”

“Why? Would you rather I stayed somewhere else?”

“No, I…I’m glad to see you.” She hugged him again. “You saved me. Thank you.”

He let go and pulled out his wallet. “Can I get you another drink? I take it you’re staying here too.”

“Yeah. What a crazy coincidence! I’ll have sex on the beach please.” He looked confused. Her cheeks flushed. “…the drink.”

“Oh. Of course.” They moved towards the bar and he placed the order. “I hope you don’t mind me crashing your party.”

“I wasn’t really expecting to be drinking alone for much longer,” she said, picking up a napkin. “I like company when I drink.”

“I see.” The barman placed two cocktails on the bar. “I can leave you to seek company.”

“No!” She groaned. “I don’t want company like Jorge.”

Ripley picked up his drink and raised it. “To company?”

“To company,” she said, clinking her glass with his. “Assuming you want company.”

“I can be company.”

She held out her arm in the direction of a table. “Great.”

X

The whole night Vic was mindful that she was drinking with her boss. They talked freely about anything and everything. She told him in great detail why Game of Thrones was worth a watch, and credit to him, he listened. She didn’t yawn or complain when he brought up a documentary he’d been watching the week before. But throughout, all she could think about was how inappropriate the whole thing was. On her fourth cocktail, her mood changed.

“I have a great view of the lagoon.”

“Really?” He sipped his drink. “I have an ocean view.”

“You should see the lagoon!” she wrapped her lips around her straw and stared up at him. “It’s beautiful at night.”

“I can imagine.”

“You don’t need to imagine.”

He cleared his throat, tilting his head. “Are you inviting me to your room?”

“I’m inviting you to look at the lagoon,” she said, fluttering her eyelashes. “From my room.”

“If it’s as wonderful as you say then how could I pass up on such a great opportunity?” He motioned in the direction of the exit. “Shall we?”

X

Halfway down the corridor to Vic’s room, Ripley paused. She turned. The look in his eyes filled her with dread. She knew it was probably the alcohol talking, but she enjoyed his company, and she didn’t want the night to end.

“My room’s just here,” he said. “I should probably…”

“Right.” She forced her smile to reach her eyes and stepped backward. “I understand.”

“No, Vic,” he reached out and grabbed her hand. “I mean, I’m just gonna freshen up, you know, before I look at the view.”

She raised her eyebrows, her eyes bugged. She looked him up and down, her eyes lingered for a moment on the small but noticeable bulge forming in his jeans.

“Sure.” She stepped backward again. “I’m in two-four-six, the other side of the corridor.”

“Great. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

He turned and unlocked his door. The second it closed behind him, Vic grabbed at the sides of her dress and sped down the corridor. Inside her room, she raced around, searching for her best underwear and a stick of deodorant. By the time there was a knock on the door Vic was sat on the end of the bed wearing the hotel issued robe. She jumped up and headed toward the door, then paused. She tightened the belt round her robe, then loosened it again, pulling the side of the robe down her arm, revealing the strap of her bra.

How could she be thinking about sleeping with her boss? Just a couple of hours ago she was fending off the prowess of a Mexican man and now she couldn’t stop picturing Lucas Ripley naked. She considered losing the robe entirely.

“Hi,” she said, pulling open the door before she could change her mind. “Sorry, I was about to get dressed but then you knocked.”

“You were?” He looked sceptical. He’d changed his shirt. The top two buttons were unfastened and she could see sandy blonde curls poking out of the gap. “I can come back.”

“No.” She took his hand and tugged him inside. 

They stared at each other, eyes fixed on eyes. Vic’s lips parted, her chest rose with every fragile breath. Her fingers loosened on his hand, but she didn’t let go. She grinned and pulled him over to the window.

“I’ll get the lights,” she said, rushing back across the room to turn them off. She hesitated by the door; if she wanted to make a move, the sooner the better. If her buzz wore off before she did so, she wasn’t sure she’d get it back. She dropped her robe and joined him by the window. The lagoon stretched out into the distance; the lights of the town visible on the other side of the dark expanse. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

He didn’t speak at first. She focused on the lights, anything to distract her from the arousal she felt the closer she stood to her boss.

“All I see is beauty.”

She turned to look at him. He stared back, his eyes fixed on her. She pointed towards the lagoon, but he didn’t look back. He closed the small gap between them, his breath hot against her cheek.

“All I want to do is kiss you, but I know it’s inappropriate.”

She laughed into an outward breath. “I’m half naked in front of you. If I didn’t want you to kiss me, I wouldn’t have invited you back here.”

“But policy…”

“Screw policy,” she said, slinging her arms around his neck and kissing him. For a moment, he just stood there, paralysed to her touch. When he tilted his head, moving her lips in time with Vic’s, she knew she was free to push the boundaries. She leant forward, pressing her whole body against him, feeling the growth in his pants. She pulled back, breathless, staring into his bright blue eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?”

“You don’t need to ask me anything because you can do whatever the hell you want to me.”

Their lips collided once more, tongues danced and lips puckered. She trailed her hands down the back of his head, along the edges of his shirt to the waistline of his pants. She pushed him back towards the window, unbuckling his belt as she went.

“I can’t believe we’re about to do this,” he said, nibbling on her bottom lip.

She tugged at his jeans, forcing the fabric down his thighs. “I can’t believe I’m about to see my boss naked.”

He lifted his hands, stopping her in her tracks. She closed her eyes and lowered her gaze, regretting the words the second they left her mouth. “Can we please forget that I’m your boss for just a minute?”

“It’s hard,” she said.

“I know, but it’s distracting me.”

“No, I mean…” she blushed, chewing on her bottom lip. She closed the gap, capturing his lips once more as her hands released him of his clothes and she felt her way across every inch of his body.

X

The other side of the bed was empty when Vic opened her eyes. She half expected it. They’d crossed a line, one which was far worse for Ripley than it could ever be for her. If worse came to the worst, she could move out of Seattle. He, on the other hand, could lose the career he’d worked in for most of his life.

“Morning.” She sat up. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you.”

“I was just…thinking.” She wrapped the sheet around her body and flung her legs over the edge of the bed. He was still there. She didn’t want to smile, but her lips curved to one side involuntarily. It wasn’t just the alcohol.

“About?”

“You and me. The situation. The mess.”

He poured hot water into two mugs and carried them over to the bed. He handed one to Vic and sat down beside her. “What mess?”

“What do you mean what mess?” she frowned, busying herself with the mug of coffee. She stared into the brown liquid.

“We’re on vacation, Vic. We’re just two people, hanging out, occasionally having sex.”

“Oc, occasionally?”

“We’re just two people, hanging out, who had sex. It could be occasional sex…if you wanted it to be.”

“I…would like that.”

“So would I.” His cheeks turned a shade of red. “We’re just two people having a vacation romance.”

“A vacation romance…I see.” She smirked. “Which means we can have as much romance and sex as we like, and then when we get home we can go back to being…”

“Chief and…not chief.”

“I’m not chief?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.

“I couldn’t think of how else to describe you.”

“How about firefighter?”

“It doesn’t really matter.” He reached over and placed his drink on the bedside table, taking hold of her hand on the way back. What matters is that what we’re doing is okay, we can have some fun, and not feel guilty.”

“I’m starving,” Vic said, placing her drink beside his. She leant towards him. She pressed her lips against his. “Would it be acceptable for our vacation romance that we share a table?”

“I think that would be more than acceptable,” he said, trailing his fingers along her bare back. He nibbled her bottom lip. “But I think I need to work up to an appetite.”

X

In the mornings, Vic sat by the pool and read a book, taking an occasional dip, while Ripley played a round of golf. In the afternoons, they went scuba diving around the underwater museum, and on a boat ride to look for dolphins. One evening they went into the city and tasted the local cuisine, another night they ate in the hotel restaurant, and the rest of the time they stayed in bed and ordered room service.

“I couldn’t find proper ice cream, so I got you a chocolate ice cream sandwich bar thing,” Ripley said, sitting down under their umbrella.

“Thanks.” Vic ripped off the packet and basked in her tasty treat, lounging on the shoreline. She picked up her book and read a couple more pages in silence. But Ripley was staring at her, and she couldn’t concentrate. “Can I help you with something?”

“You spent half the morning reading,” he said. “How about we go for a paddle in the ocean?”

“I also went for a dip in the pool this morning,” she said, raising her eyebrows. “But let me finish this page and we can go for a walk.”

They packed up their few belongings and walked hand in hand along the edge of the shoreline. The silence was comfortable for the first time since they’d arrived, and Vic felt completely at ease. She squeezed Ripley’s fingers, a stupid grin spread across her face.

“Since we hooked up I haven’t had one nightmare.”

“I hope that’s a sign that you’re relaxed,” he said, swinging their arms between them as they walked.

She smirked. “I think it means that you’re good for me, Lucas Ripley.”

He sighed. “I just hope that you don’t regress when we return home.”

“Don’t remind me,” she said. “One more night. I can’t believe we have one more night.”

He leant his arm against her, shoving her gently. “We can always join the mile high club.”

She scoffed, her mouth agape. “Did you seriously just say that?”

“I can be adventurous.”

“No, you can’t…” She frowned, the corners of her lips curved upwards. “You’re Chief Ripley. You went scuba diving but only because I begged you. You won’t watch Game of Thrones because you don’t want to see blood and gore.”

“I’ve had sex with one of my subordinates,” he said.

She tilted her head and pressed her lips together. “I’ll give you that one. But you’re not a mile high club kind of guy.”

“Aren’t I?”

“Aren’t you?” She stared at him. “I’ll consider having sex anywhere that isn’t too disgusting, or full of sand, but we can’t join the mile high club unless you’re thoroughly invested.”

“I can be invested.”

“We’ll see,” she said, shrugging.

“I can be invested!”

“I said we’ll see.” She let go of his hand and ran backwards. “Catch me if you can!”

He sped off after her and she turned, racing off into the distance. After a while, she grew tired of running, and she slowed, allowing him to wrap his arms around her and kiss her. She twisted his hair around her fingers, deepening the kiss as the sun began its decent in the water.

“I don’t want this to end.”

“Me neither,” he said, kissing her again. “Maybe we could pretend there’s a problem with the plane.”

“You mean it could have a broken phalange?” He scrunched up his face. “Please tell me you’ve seen Friends!”

“A couple of episodes here and there.”

She shook her head, still tangled up in his arms. “When we get home I am so making you watch the whole of Friends. You might not want to give me Game of Thrones, but this one I won’t budge on.”

They stopped moving, their eyes fixed on each other. She knew her mistake, but she didn’t want to vocalise it. She didn’t want him to vocalise it.

“I know.”

“I’m sorry, Vic. There’s no other way.”

“I know.” She turned away from him and brushed tears from the corners of her eyes. “It’s fine. Just a vacation romance. We knew what it was from the start.”

He looped his arms around her and pulled her in close. They stared out across the sun setting in the sky. “If it’s any consolation, this has been the best vacation romance I’ve ever had.”

“Me too.”

X

Vic zipped up her suitcase when there was a knock at the door. She returned it to the floor and went to open it. When her eyes landed on Ripley, his suitcase trailed behind him, she thought her heart was going to break in two.

“You ready?”

She forged a smile. “Come in for a moment.”

“Are you not ready? Check out is in fifteen minutes.”

“I know.” She sat down on the end of her bed and watched him stare out at the lagoon view. He looked so relaxed, and happier than she’d seen him in a long time. “Come here.”

He sat beside her. A sense of sadness lingered between them, the elephant in the room. She interlinked their fingers and grinned at him, though she knew it never quite reached her eyes. Not like it had for the entire week.

“Ten minutes,” she said, running her hands along his thigh. “That’s long enough, right?”

“I dunno about that,” he replied, leaning in and capturing her lips. “But maybe it’ll be okay if we’re a little late.”

She snorted into his kisses and cupped his cheek. “Don’t ever change, Lucas Ripley.”

X

“We have six whole hours left,” Vic said, swinging their arms between them as they walked along the passenger boarding bridge. “Whatever will we do with them?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Are we even sat together this time?”

“Oh.” She held up her boarding pass next to Ripley’s and her heart sunk. “I guess not. I just assumed…”

“Me too.”

They entered the aircraft and Vic walked down the aisle with Ripley, stopping by his seat, helping him to place his bag in the overhead locker. She stared at him with such longing. Every attempt at a smile disappeared into the sadness she felt over the lack of time they had left. She wasn’t prepared.

“Guess we can still meet in the bathroom around halfway,” Ripley said.

She sighed. “I dunno. Maybe we should just leave it all behind in Mexico.”

“Are you sure?”

“No.” She choked back tears. “But I don’t want to think about the time we can’t spend together, or that it’s nearly over.”

He cupped her cheeks. She accepted his kiss, deepening it the second his lips touched hers. She couldn’t find the words so a kiss would have to be enough.

“See you when we land,” he said, brushing a couple of tears from her cheek. “Hughes.”

She nodded. “See you in Seattle, Chief Ripley.”

Their fingers linked as long as their arms would stretch, but eventually, as Vic walked towards the back of the plane, their connection dropped and she was left alone with a multitude of feelings and no one to share her journey with.

She slouched into her seat, on the verge of tears, and it didn’t escape her notice that she was as much a mess now as she had been on the flight over.

“You okay?” a woman asked as she took the seat beside her.

Vic nodded. “Sad goodbye.”

From her seat, Vic could see him. Not all the time, and not in his entirety. But she could see him enough that when he got up to go to the bathroom, she followed him with her eyes. Hoping that maybe, just maybe he’d signal for to join him.

He didn’t.

When they landed in Seattle, she rushed down the aisle in the hope of walking with him, but he’d gone ahead and there were too many people to catch up.

At baggage reclaim, he was nowhere to be seen. She stood around waiting until the last bag had been taken, and all that was left was a woman with a pushchair struggling to carry her luggage.

When Vic climbed into her Uber home, her heart ached for the man she wasn’t supposed to fall for, and she didn’t know how it would ever repair itself.


	3. The Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started work this weekend past and I am EXHAUSTED. I do 4 days in a row from Thursday. It's taken me longer than I was planning to get this chapter up. I also discovered that 3 chapters is not enough, so there will be at least one more. I'm anticipating the 4th chapter will be the end. But we shall see.

The heat overwhelmed her, dragging her down. She moved through the room, pushing beyond the oppressive environment. He was there somewhere, and she could get to him. She knew she could. It wouldn’t take much, just a little help. She searched the smoky room, gasping for breath as the toxic fumes filled her lungs.

“Lucas?” she stepped closer, her heart beat faster. He was the only one who could help her. “Please, you need to help me get Montgomery to safety.”

He didn’t move. He just stared ahead, away from her. She reached out and touched his arm, but he still wouldn’t move. She walked around him and stared into his glassy eyes.

“Lucas, please,” she said, her words disappearing into sobs. “Help me.”

He shook his head and pushed past her.

“Engine 19, Ladder 19, Aid Car 19 house fire respond 227 Foxtrot Road.”

Vic jumped out of bed, her body moving before her mind could catch up. She ran down the stairs and climbed into her turnout gear. She sat in the back of the engine before Herrera and Bishop got in. She stared into the darkened cab, still not fully awake, but completely ready to deal with whatever fire they came upon.

“Finally,” Ripley said, approaching Herrera the second she climbed out of the engine. “We have a problem at Station 31 and I need you and Gibson to take a lead. I was hoping to stay but I can’t.”

“Not a problem, Sir,” Herrera said, putting on her helmet. “I’ll liaise with Gibson and we’ll manage the situation.”

The house was well lit. Vic walked around the side of the engine, securing her helmet on her head. She wanted to stay close to Ripley, to hear his voice, to listen to the rhythm of his words. But she was just his subordinate. That was all she could ever be. “Evening, Chief Ripley.”

“Good Evening, Victoria,” he said, and Vic was sure she saw his smile spread farther than she’d seen it since they got back.

He headed back to his car and drove off, leaving Herrera to shout the orders. After speaking briefly to Gibson, they stood in front of the team.

“Since when were you and the chief on a first name basis?” Bishop asked, raising her eyebrows.

“We, we’re not…he’s not…I don’t know why he called me Victoria, okay? I don’t control every word that comes out of his mouth. He’s an adult, he can make decisions for himself, and he clearly made this one without my involvement.” She folded her arms and waited for Herrera to commence speaking.

“Oh-kay.” Bishop frowned. “Somebody’s cranky this morning.”

“Miller, I want you to find out if there’s a risk to anyone’s life. Bishop, Hughes and Warren, get prepped for entry to the building.”

X

The roof was the most peaceful place first thing in the morning, before everybody got out of bed and the noise levels of the station increased threefold. Vic sat down and stared out as the sun came up. She’d tried to sleep but her night was plagued by nightmares. When a call came in around four, Vic and Miller went out on Aid Car and by the time they returned, she was wide awake. She considered going downstairs to scrub the rig clean, but the changing colours of the sky captivated her.

“Oh. I didn’t realise anyone else was up here.”

She didn’t move. His voice was enough to know who had joined her. She stared straight ahead, basking in the sky’s beauty.

“You can say hi to me, Victoria.”

She sighed. She didn’t want to say anything, not right now, not when her feelings were so strong and her hurt so raw. She sat upright and turned to him. “I’m just enjoying the sunrise.”

“We can enjoy it together, as colleagues.”

She scoffed. “Right, colleagues. Not friends. Just colleagues.”

“I…I’m sorry,” he said, hovering beside her.

“Forget about it,” she said, standing up and heading for the door. She hesitated. “Bye, Lucas.”

X

For most of the week he sat in that office, pushing papers around, calling orders from on high. Vic worked diligently, she focused as much as possible on the tasks required of her, but it didn’t change Lucas Ripley’s presence. Seeing him, working with him, being cornered on the roof by him…she couldn’t do it. He was only there while they waited for the new captain. She arrived back from an aid car call to find the station empty. Except for Ripley. She stood by his window, watching him scratch his chin and type something into the computer. When he looked up, she froze. He narrowed his eyes.

She pushed open the office door. “How can you be so cold?”

“Excuse me?” he asked, his eyes wide.

“I don’t understand how, after everything, you could be so cold to me this past week, and you totally cut me off when we landed. I thought maybe we could see each other, at least say goodbye, before we left the airport.”

He sighed, clasping his hands together on the desk in front of him. “What did you want me to do, Victoria?”

She opened her mouth to speak, then closed it again. What she wanted was for him to not cut off their relationship like it meant nothing.

He stood up and moved around the desk, sitting down upon it. “Kiss you in the arrivals lounge? Hold your hand as we shared a cab home? This can’t happen, Hughes. You know that.”

“I…I do, but…” She didn’t want to believe it. She couldn’t. After all those years of dating and meeting men who weren’t worthy of her company, she finally met someone she could see…something with. He was different.

“There’s no buts, Vic. You and me, we can’t happen.”

She chewed on the inside of her lip to stop herself from crying. “Can’t we?”

He closed his eyes. His nostrils flared. “No. No. We can’t.”

“Fine.” She turned tail and fled through the door, thrusting it closed behind her. She winced when it slammed. Fresh tears pricked her eyes.

X

People milled around the bar, drinking and chatting, filling almost every space available. Vic hated it when it was busy. She longed for the quiet nights in Cancun, just her and Ripley, talking until the small hours, whether before or after sex. After their conversation the day before, Vic felt like wallowing, and the constant interruptions from lewd men did nothing to make herself feel better.

“I hear you’re a firefighter.” He perched on the stool beside her. Another one. She gave him a cursory glance. “Come on! Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” she asked, frowning.

“Like you don’t wanna talk to me.”

“Maybe because I don’t.”

“But you’re hot.”

“And?” She shook her head. “Do you think that gives you a right to talk to me? I don’t even know you.”

In the corner of her eye, she could see him. He pushed his way through the crowd, his blonde curls dark under the dim lighting. Her attention was dragged across the room, following him to the other end of the bar.

“Excuse me,” he said, holding up the bottle in his hand. “Can I get another?”

He turned his head. His eyes landed on Vic’s. He looked so…relaxed. A fire burned deep inside. She gripped her glass tighter, her knuckles whitened. She ground her teeth. He stared back. He lifted his hand, the briefest action, but it only sought to anger her further. She was furious with him. After what happened, after what he said…she knew it was childish, and he was right, they couldn’t be together. But she didn’t want that.

“Hey, sexy boy,” she said, turning to the man beside her. She grabbed him round the back of the neck and pulled him toward her, pushing her tongue between his lips before he could respond. He reacted quickly, his mouth moving in time with hers. His fingers gripped her thighs, and she let him.

When she finally pulled back, her eyes returned to Ripley, who stared with his mouth half open. The relaxed expression had changed dramatically.

The man beside her tried to attack her mouth with his. She pushed him off. “Get off me. I was trying to make someone jealous.”

“That’s not fair!” he shouted. “You can’t lead someone on like that.”

“Yeah?” she asked, her eyes wide. “Die mad about it.”

She downed her drink, pushing the glass back across the bar. She stood up and walked off. She considered searching for Ripley, but she couldn’t stand the thought of seeing him look so sad.

X

She scrubbed the engine until every last inch she could see was spotless. The morning had been quiet. Only the aid car had been called out, and they were back within the hour. Vic hated cleaning at the best of times, but at the worst it gave her something to focus on.

“Bishop, Hughes, I want to see you individually in my office.”

Vic stood up. She caught Bishop’s eye as he left the room again. “What does he want?”

“Dunno,” Vic said. “Captain Sullivan sure has a stick up his ass.”

“He’s been here five minutes,” Herrera said. “Maybe we should give him a chance.”

“Don’t tell me you’re not pissed that you or Gibson didn’t make Captain,” Bishop said, taking off her gloves and tossing them into a box. “I’ll go first.”

“Kind of makes you miss the Chief, doesn’t it?” Herrera asked, laughing.

Vic laughed too. “Yeah. He’s a stickler for the rules.”

“He seems to like you.”

“Me?” She scoffed. “Why, why would you think he likes me?”

She shrugged. “You two seem to be friendlier than usual.”

“Not a clue what’s going on there,” she said, scratching the back of her neck. She glanced away and refocused cleaning the panel of the engine. “He’s a brown noser.”

“He’s not that bad!”

“All he ever talks about are the rules. You were all trapped in the skyscraper and he would have let you all die.”

Herrera narrowed her eyes. “I didn’t think he was like that.”

“Yeah, well, you were inside a burning building while he was doing it.”

X

The simple red dress hugged Vic around her waist. It took her a moment to remember how to walk in heels, and she carried a small purse. Two weeks had passed since her last encounter with Ripley. He popped into the station occasionally to visit their new captain, but she somehow managed to avoid him. She knew there was zero chance of continuing that tonight. Herrera and Bishop climbed out of the cab beside her and together, they walked towards the entrance to the function hall.

“I’ve wanted to come to the charity ball for years,” Herrera said. “I’ve not been since I was a little girl, and then I was only allowed to stay for an hour. Since I joined the fire department I’ve been working every year.”

“Really?” Vic asked. “What’s it like?”

“Load of sexy men in tuxedos asking everyone to dance, and not enough women to go around,” she said. “Or at least that’s what I assume. But most of the sexy men bring their wives and really it’s just like a high school dance but without the added pressure of being the unpopular kid.”

Bishop tilted her head. “You were unpopular in high school?”

“Well, no.” Herrera shrugged.

Vic rolled her eyes. “Let me guess, Prom Queen?”

“Homecoming Queen. Christina Forster beat me to Prom Queen, and only because I broke my leg cheerleading.”

“Cheerleading?” Bishop stared at her.

“I had to do something to maintain peak physical form.”

“I swam my way through high school,” Bishop said. “I was in my first Olympics in junior year. Don’t even remember if I went to my prom, or the prom for the class before me. I was Prom Queen...but only because I was sleeping with the girl who actually won.”

Vic groaned and shook her head. “While you two were off being queens of high school, some of us had braces until we were in senior year.”

Herrera wrapped an arm around her shoulder and they headed into the building. “Don’t worry, Vic, high school is nowhere near as judgmental as wives and girlfriends of the male members of the fire department.”

“I thought you said it was less pressure.”

“Oh, it is,” she said. “We’re less geeky, awkward looking teenager and more sexy female firefighters. They may be judgemental as hell, but we get to spend lonely, wet Seattle nights with their partners.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” Vic asked.

“They feel threatened by us,” Bishop said.

“That does make me feel better.”

X

The function hall was decorated in flowers, with white covers and red ribbons tied around each chair. It was like a fairytale, or a wedding, except everyone no one person was the focal point of the evening. Vic sat at a table surrounded by her fellow Station 19 crew and they dined on smoked salmon, drank wine, and ate a trio of desserts. By the time they were ushered into a bar area so they could rearrange the tables for dancing, Vic was well and truly stuffed. When they returned to the function room, she danced with Herrera and Bishop, a guy from Station 23, and an old man who seemed to think she was his granddaughter.

“May I cut in?”

Her breath caught in her throat. Ripley. She nodded and handed the old man off to a woman beside her. Ripley’s blue eyes stared down at her. His hand rested on her waist as their other hands interlinked. The memories of their fingers connected on the plane, in bed…she couldn’t stare into those eyes anymore.

She turned her head to one side. “I’m not sure I can do this.”

He leant in close and she could barely breathe. “You are by far the most beautiful person here tonight.”

“Lucas, please.” She regretted looking at him. She couldn’t look away. Not when his beautiful eyes looked at her with so much feeling.

“If things were different,” he said, barely inches from her face. “This would make a superb wedding venue.”

Lifting up a hand, Vic pushed him backward, whilst stepping back herself. She glared at him, her heart racing against her chest. “Did you just say that?”

“I…I guess I did.”

“I can’t do this.”

She turned tail and fled the room.

Outside, a fountain lit up red, shining brightly off the coins hundreds of people had thrown into the water. It moved up above a spout and showered down around it. The sound of its movement, the gentle gushing, settled her fractured mind and evened out her beating heart.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“Leave me alone.” She spun around. He rested his hand on her shoulder, and she turned back. “I don’t understand you.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

Throwing her hands out at her sides, Vic shook her head. “You blank me on the plane, and at the airport when we got home. Then you act all civil to me at work like we didn’t sleep together.”

“Please.” He raised a hand and lowered it repeatedly. “Keep your voice down.”

She ignored him. There was too much spinning through her head to stop now. “Now you’re talking about this place being great for a wedding. Did you just look at me and think “how else can I break her heart?”

He stared at her, taken aback by her words. “Your heart is broken?”

“Yeah.” She rubbed the bridge of her nose. “Just a little bit.”

“Oh. I see.”

Neither of them said a word for a long while. The fountain continued its movement, water flowing repeatedly up and over. Vic sighed heavily. “Did our vacation romance mean anything to you?”

“Of course it did,” he said, grasping at her elbow.

She trailed her fingertip below her eye. “Why are you being the way you’re being?”

“You know why.” He sighed. “Policy…”

“Screw policy!” she shouted, her eyebrows creased.

“I can’t just…”

“No? What do you think we were doing when we screwed on vacation?”

“Please don’t make what we had sound so vulgar.”

“Why not?” She scratched the back of her head, her mouth upturned. “It doesn’t matter anyway.”

“It does.”

“Why?”

“I…Victoria, we, I…”

She cut him off. “You can’t even answer me, can you?”

“I don’t know how to answer you without implicating us both.”

“How is having an honest conversation going to implicate us?” Silence. The distant sound of conversation filled the space, growing louder. “Well? Are you gonna tell me? Or do I have to wait another week for you to say anything more to me?”

“Vic, please.” He gripped her elbow a little tighter and pushed her along the side of the building. “This is hard enough already.”

“Hard, is it?” She shook him off. “It’s hard for you to ignore me?”

“Of course it’s hard for me to ignore you. Don’t you think I want to be able to kiss you again? To hold you? To…to make love to you?”

“Make love?” She scoffed. “Like that’s a better phrase than screwing.”

“It is when all I can think about is how much I fell for you.”

Her lips parted involuntarily. Vic looked into his eyes, searched for the truth of his words. “…what?”

“I…I didn’t say anything,” he said, turning his body away from her.

“Yes, yes you did.” She tugged him back by his lapel. “We, we barely know each other.”

He smiled the briefest smile which very quickly became a light on his face. “I feel like I got to know you far greater in that week in Cancun than I ever did being your chief.”

She lowered her head and sighed. “Don’t.”

“Why?”

She lifted her head again, and stared into his eyes, holding his gaze. “Because I think I might be falling for you too.”

He gripped her fingers and pulled her further round the building. “I don’t know what to do now.”

“Don’t talk like that.”

“Why not?”

“Don’t talk like that when we can’t be together.” She let go of his hand. “Don’t drag me round here for privacy when we can’t do this. What’s the point?”

“The point is the truth, being honest with each other.”

Vic tapped her toes on the ground, her eyes glistened. “But it doesn’t make me feel any better knowing that we can’t be together.”

He didn’t speak. She tossed her arms up at her sides and headed back up the side of the building. He marched forward, following her back towards the front entrance and grabbed her arm.

“Stop,” she said, attempting to shake off his grip. “Just let me go.”

“No.”

“But…”

“All I want to do is kiss you right now.” The attraction she felt while they were away increased tenfold in that moment. She silently hoped that maybe, just maybe he was going to change his mind. “But we’re in a very open place.”

“I wanna kiss you too.”

“Meet me at my place in an hour?”

“Can’t I meet you now?”

He hesitated. He took her hand and lifted it between them, drawing circles on her palm with his thumb. “I have to go back inside. There’s speeches. I have to make my speech.”

“Okay.”

“You gonna come and watch?”

She tilted her head. “Is it gonna be as boring as your speech at the Station 19 quiz night?”

“That speech was motivational!”

“Yeah, for a dog.”

“Hey!”

“I’m kidding, now get back in there and kill it.”


	4. The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if this is the most satisfying end, or not, but I needed to get it finished and I think it's done enough. My brain needs to finish something right now. Just imagine that this chapter is a mixture of what I've written, and the actual scenes from the show. I am considering writing a Vicley fic for NaNoWriMo this year, but I need a really good idea. I wish my new job wasn't sapping up energy. My brain has less than 2 weeks to come up with a great idea to write. Suggestions/ideas most welcome.

The taxi ride to Ripley’s house dragged on for an age. Vic sat beside him, stealing glances, desperately hoping he’d make some sort of move. She stared at his fingers, inches from her own, wondering what was going to happen next. Her heart swelled with hope and expectation, but the pain she’d felt over the last couple of weeks overwhelmed her.

“Can I get you a drink?” Ripley asked, leading the way through the house and into the kitchen. Vic took in the sight around her, the beautiful home he’d created. She wondered which of his wives he’d shared it with, whether the first one had picked out the wallpaper, or if the second had demanded he take her furniture shopping. When his fingers touched her shoulder, a sharp intake of breath paralysed her. “Wine? Beer?”

She forced her body to continue breathing. “Wine, please.”

She perched on a stool and sipped her drink, trying not to picture the man in front of her naked. He loosened his tie and the top button of his shirt and grabbed a beer.

“I’m so glad tonight is over.”

“Why?”

“I hate public speaking.”

“Really?” She narrowed her eyes and watched the strained expression on his face soften. “I never saw you as the type to hate speaking to a crowd.”

He shook his head. “Not my favourite thing. I’d rather have kissed you in front of the entire department.”

She raised her eyebrows and smirked. “I don’t know whether to be offended or flattered.”

Ripley walked around the counter and sat down beside her. He cleared his throat and swung his legs round, until his eyes were fixed on Vic’s. She stared back, her mouth dry and her heart thumping.

“I don’t know what to do,” he said, resting an elbow on the counter and closing the space between them. A small crease formed between her eyebrows. “What we shared in Cancun…I don’t know about you, but I’ve not felt like that in a long time.”

“Talk about never,” Vic said, then covered her face. “I mean, I’ve had relationships.”

“You don’t need to explain.” The tip of his finger on her wrist sent a shock through Vic’s body. “I don’t know if I’ve ever felt like this, this quickly.”

“Not even with your wives?” Vic covered his hand and held it over her wrist. She relished in his touch, so innocent, so filled with expectation. “Didn’t you feel like this with them? At the start?”

“No.” He stood up, abandoning his beer bottle on the counter. He gripped her hand and she let go of her wine glass. She stood opposite him; their eyes fixed. “Not like this.”

“What about work?” she asked, edging closer, their fingers still interlinked. “What about your position?”

He trailed his knuckles across her cheek, then tugged her out of the kitchen. “Let’s worry about that tomorrow.”

She followed faithfully. “Where are you taking me?”

“My bedroom…if that’s okay?!”

X

In the morning, the sun shone through the gap in the curtains. Vic rolled over, her arm colliding with the very solid, very naked body of Lucas Ripley. Her lips curved right up to her eyes and she crawled up his chest, trailing her fingers across his body. Leaning over him, he opened his eyes, perfect blue orbs stared back at her and she couldn’t help but smile again. He returned the smile.

“Good morning,” Vic said, chewing on her bottom lip.

“Good morning, Victoria,” he replied, wrapping his arms around her shoulder blades and pulling her in close.

Her breath hitched in her throat as his lips landed on hers. She parted her lips, deepening the kiss, reminding herself of the mouth she’d learnt just a couple of weeks previously. She lowered herself down against his bare skin, gliding her body back and forth as every movement of their lips pushed them into an aroused state.

He groaned and rolled her over. Vic expected him to follow, but he didn’t. She swallowed a lump forming in her throat as the reality of the next day set in.

“We can’t do this, can we?” she asked, staring up at the smooth, white ceiling.

He cleared his throat. “I want to. God, Vic, I want nothing else right now. But…”

“It’s too much of a risk to our careers.” She knew it before he said anything, they’d both known it for weeks. The first kiss, the first time they slept together, their days were always numbered. “How can we keep our hands off each other?”

The bed moved as he shifted his weight onto his side. He cupped her cheek, running his thumb back and forth across her skin. “Not being with you is going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.”

“Same.”

X

The room was full of firefighters and station support staff, almost every seat was filled, making it difficult for Vic to find somewhere to sit. When she spotted Montgomery sitting beside an empty seat, she groaned, then sat beside him. After everything, she wanted to make up with him. She craved his company, and though her nightmares had slackened off, she still felt deeply for him. By the end of the night, she felt the wall crumble.

“You wanna grab a drink?”

Montgomery smiled. “Not tonight. But soon?”

“Sounds good.” He motioned to the doorway. “I’m gonna stay a little longer.”

He frowned. “You okay? I know we haven’t really talked much recently, but you know I’m here.”

“I know. Thanks, Travis.” She grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze. “I just wanna apologise to the chief for how I spoke to him during the skyscraper fire.”

He squeezed her hand back and let go. “I’ll see you at work.”

The room emptied slowly until all that was left was a couple of men from station 31 stood by the refreshment table. Vic hovered at the back of the room as Ripley piled up the chairs.

“Want some help?” she asked, heading across the room toward him. He nodded and she picked up a chair, putting it on top of the one beside it.

“Thanks Hughes,” he said, carrying a pile to the side of the room. He glanced over at the men stood chatting across the room.

She motioned towards them. “Hopefully you can go home soon.”

“It’s fine.” He took the pile of chairs from Vic and she continued the next row. “People can stay as long as they need.”

“You working tomorrow?”

He picked up another chair. “No. I have a day off. You?”

“I’m off too. Got a dentist appointment first thing.”

The door clicked shut and Vic jumped upright, twisting round to check whether the men had gone. She caught Ripley’s eyes and forged a smile. He kept piling up chairs.

“You in a hurry?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Not exactly,” he said, pushing the last pile of chairs to the side of the room. He scratched the back of his head. “I’ve been thinking about you.”

“Oh?” she walked over, stuffing her hands into the back pockets of her jeans. “You sure do a lot of public speaking for someone who hates it.”

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Yeah. This was more…therapeutic than anything. Might have been harder if you hadn’t been there in the audience.”

She lowered her head. “Lucas.”

“I know.” He grasped at her hand and held it between them. “I’m trying so hard not to think about you.”

“Yesterday I hoped you’d turn up randomly, like you used to do.”

“I still do it.”

“No, you don’t.”

He shrugged. “I don’t want anyone to get suspicious.”

“Won’t they get suspicious if you stop coming over?” She edged forward. “It’s not like I’m gonna jump you in the beanery.”

He smirked. “The beanery would be like having sex in a goldfish bowl, the turnout room would be a fare better locat…”

She cleared her throat and let go of his hand. Vic inched forwards, her eyes fixed on Ripley’s. “You’ve thought about where we might have sex at Station 19?”

He chewed on his lip. “Haven’t you?”

She lifted her hand to his cheek and ran her thumb across his lips. “All the time. When I’m in the turnout room, the store closet, the corner of the bunk room where nobody can see anything if you’re right in the very corner. Last night all I could think about was that…”

“I would suggest right here,” he said, his words disappearing into her kiss. She tangled her fingers up in his dark blond curls, her tongue moved across his mouth. He pulled back, gasping for breath. “But someone’ll be here soon to lock up.”

“My place?” she asked, struggling to regain her breath. “Or yours?”

He closed his eyes, stepping back, creating more space between them.

“Or nowhere,” Vic said, looking down at her feet. The excitement building inside of her faded, replaced by shame and regret. She turned away. “I’ll go.”

His fingers gripped her arm tightly. She turned back around, hope and expectation building once more.

“We can’t be seen leaving together,” he said. “Meet me at my place in thirty minutes.”

The second he opened the door to his home, Vic jumped on him, her lips moving in sync with his mouth. She placed slow kisses along his collarbone, tugging at the material of his shirt until it landed on the floor. Every step closer to the bedroom made her hungrier and hungrier for the body she was learning more every time they slept together.

“Wait,” he said, stopping in the hallway. He pushed her jeans down, his lips trailing wet kisses across her neck. She couldn’t breathe. His fingers hooked around her underwear and she pushed him back against the opposite wall, sliding her body against his, deepening their kiss with every moment. She stepped out of her jeans and backed herself towards bedroom.

X

Vic left before he woke up. She half hated the idea of going to the dentist, despite being confident that all was well. But she was secretly grateful for a reason to leave without saying goodbye. She knew the conversation they would have, again. They couldn’t do this. Nothing had changed. He was still her superior, and their jobs were still at risk. No amount of conversation would change that. They kept coming back to each other, and she knew one of them had to stop it before it got too far. She stopped by a coffee shop on the way home when her cell phone buzzed.

“Chief?” she asked, answering the call.

“Victoria, you left.”

She cleared her throat, glancing around at the other customers around her. “Yeah. Dentist appointment.”

“Why didn’t you wake me?”

“I’ll get a half-caf latte with oat milk,” she said to the barista. “Chief, I’m a bit busy right now. Unless there’s something important…”

“Why do you keep calling me chief?” He sighed. “I know what I’ve said before. This has been going on for weeks. We shouldn’t, but then we do…I was calling to ask if you wanted to spend the afternoon together.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Is that wise?”

“I often drive out of the city on my day off or catch the ferry boats across to one of the islands.”

“Somewhere where nobody knows you…”

He laughed. “Exactly. What do you say?”

She handed over a ten-dollar bill. “I say give me five minutes to get my coffee and I’ll meet you.”

“I will see you soon.”

X

They strolled along the footpath with woodland on one side and a lake on the other, their fingers interlinked and their shoulders brushing alongside each other occasionally. Vic squeezed Ripley’s hand, swinging their arms gently between them. The sun shone high in the sky and though it wasn’t warm, it was warm enough with a thicker jacket.

“This was a brilliant idea,” Vic said, motioning to the deserted surroundings. “It’s beautiful, I’ve never been here before.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Really? I come here all the time. How long have you lived in Seattle?”

“Five years.”

“And you’ve never been to the island?”

She shrugged. “If I’m on the water I’m kayaking, not getting a big-ass boat to some island where they sell overpriced coffee.”

“The coffee here is quite reasonable,” he said. “But I much prefer this side. It’s quieter. The perfect location to go for a walk, clear the mind.”

She fixed her eyes on him until he looked back. “What do you need to clear your mind of today?”

“Nothing.” He squeezed her hand tightly. “I’m just glad we have somewhere to go where we don’t need to worry about anyone from the department seeing us.”

“What is this?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, we’ve been hooking up for weeks now like that’s all we are. An occasional hook up. Then you invite me to a deserted island so we can go for a walk. Are we occasional sex? Are we in a relationship? What…what are we? What are we doing?”

“I feel like I’m in a relationship with you, Victoria.”

“But we’re not, are we?” The ground beneath their feet became wet and muddy. Vic, still holding Ripley’s hand, grabbed hold of his arm and stepped across the worst of the ground. “We’re not really anything.”

“Aren’t we? I feel like we are.”

“What are we gonna do, Lucas?” She sighed and let go of his hand. The beautiful lake spread out across the horizon. The whole place made her feel so much more relaxed than she’d been in months. But she couldn’t not think about the elephant in the room. “How can we be in a relationship when we’re not even supposed to be dating? We try to stay away from each other, and we just keep on coming back to each other. I don’t wanna have to stay away from you.”

“I don’t wanna have to stay away from you either.” He stopped and she stopped beside him, turning to face him. He ran a hand across her forehead, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. Her breath hitched in her throat. His hand trailed down her neck. “You’re beautiful, and funny, and smart and I can’t think of anyone I’d rather spend my free time with.”

“God I love you,” she whispered, staring into his eyes. A slight crease formed between his eyebrows and she jumped backwards. “Fu…no.”

“No?”

“No. I didn’t say that.” She marched off along the path, kicking a couple of rocks across the ground as she went. Ripley sped up his pace behind her. “I didn’t say anything. Nothing needs to change. Everything’s just fine as it is, I mean we can’t ever see each other unless it’s at night and we’re hiding but it doesn’t matter. It’s nothing serious, just a bit of fun. We’re having fun. You’re having fun, aren’t you? Cause I’m having so much fun.”

Ripley grabbed her arm, stopping her from rushing further ahead. The words disappeared into her mouth, his lips collided with hers, cutting her off, stopping her from saying something more. She tried to block out the analysis of her brain, but it battled with the feel of his mouth on hers.

When he pulled away again, his lips curved into the widest smile and she couldn’t speak. He brushed her hair back from her face again and leant in so close their noses touched. “I love you too, Victoria Hughes.”

X

“Is your husband joining you today?” Cam asked, pouring her a mug of coffee.

Vic wrapped her hands around her drink and tapped her foot on the ground. She was sat at their usual table, drinking her usual drink, waiting, anticipating, and hoping that today would end well. “He’s on his way.”

“Are you okay? You look nervous.” He scrunched up his face, then his eyes grew wide. “Wait, are you pregnant? Are you nervous because you have to tell him you’re pregnant?”

Her own eyes grew wide. “No. No, no, no. Not pregnant. No, Cam. We’re not, I’m not. No.”

“Oh.” He forged a smile. “Well, let me know when he arrives. I’d be happy to get you some eggs, or if you wanted something different.”

“Thanks.”

The room filled with music, battling out against the sound system of the diner. Vic lifted her eyes to find Ripley stood in the doorway, a speaker in his hands. He held a bunch of flowers in his arms, and a stupid grin on his face. He looked as nervous as she felt. She stood up and stepped out of the booth as he walked towards her.

“That’s the song we danced to at the ball.” She forged a smile, but her nerves got the better of her. She glanced at Cam, across the room, fiddling with the volume control on the diner’s sound system. When he finished, he raised two thumbs up and she nodded in thanks.

“These are for you,” he said, handing over the flowers.

She took the bouquet and breathed in the subtle smells of the flowers, getting lost in the moment. They were merely a bouquet of flowers, but they represented the moment they were about to share.

“Thank you, they’re beautiful.” She placed the bouquet on the table beside her and refocused her attention on Ripley.

“I know that you asked me yesterday and the point of having breakfast today is that I give you an answer.”

She stood a little taller, her eyes a little wider, as the anticipation overwhelmed her. He wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t a yes. He wouldn’t have brought flowers if he wasn’t going to say he would marry her – for real. Right?

“But the more time that passed last night, while I was awake in bed, the more time I had to think about what I wanted to say.”

She averted her gaze. His words weren’t yes. She couldn’t believe that he was saying “but…” as though her whole world wasn’t about to crumble. Humiliation spread across her face.

“Victoria,” he said, a slight hint of emotion caught in his voice. She closed her eyes. She couldn’t do this. When she opened them again, he knelt on the floor, on one knee, with a ring in his hand. She couldn’t breathe. “I know our journey has been unusual, and quick, and there are a million reasons why we shouldn’t be doing this. But all I need is one really good reason. I can’t imagine my life without you, not now, not after things changed. You make me happier than both of my ex-wives combined, and I never thought that could be possible. I know you were hoping for an answer, instead I come here with a question. Call me a traditionalist, but I think I should be the one to do this. Will you, Victoria Hughes, marry me?”

Words escaped her, lost in the silence of the room, the only sound was the music playing softly in the background and her breath hitched in her throat. “Yes. Yes, I’ll marry you.”

He stood up with the largest grin spread across his face. He swooped her up into his arms and swung her around. The silence of the room disappeared into several people’s cheers and clapping. Over Ripley’s shoulder, Vic could see Cam wiping a tear from his eye as he clapped with the crowd.

“We’re really doing this,” he said, his grin laced with nerves.

She felt the same, deep down. Every ounce of happiness was laced with a fear that everything was going to fall apart before they could walk down the aisle. But then she was reminded once more that she was so close to marrying the love of her life and it all melted away.

“We’re really doing it.”

**THE END**


End file.
